Never Never Land

Things have been pretty uneventful around here on the pregnancy front. We have settled into a routine of sorts. Tuesday will make 23 weeks, and everything seems to be progressing nicely. Carrie continues to be very uncomfortable. That's not front page news. The Austin weather has been cool and rainy, so she has been unable to float in the pool. Very soon it will be hot enough here in Texas to melt sidewalks and she will have plenty of time to float. The boys are doing a lot of moving, and this sometimes gives her motion sickness. Personally, I can't imagine having three living organisms moving around inside me. I would have more than motion sickness.

The reality of having triplets continues to sink in and hit us both over the head with a giant reality stick. This applies to me more so than Carrie. Carrie is way better at reality than I am. A mother's instinct is an amazing thing. The transformation is so quick and so complete. I can see how some men feel blind sided by this new woman who is very practical and very together that now stands before them.

This new reality has been tough for me.

See, since I was 15 years old, the only thing in this world that concerned me was playing the guitar and music in general. That's it. My life revolved around the guitar. Every single decision I made was with that in mind. Slim, another member of Back Porch Mary, likes to point out that for years if it didn't have to do with drinking beer or playing guitar, then I wasn't interested in even talking about it. This is true. I love every single thing about the guitar. I derive such sheer joy from just sitting and practicing the guitar that sometimes I can't believe how happy I am when I simply have a guitar in my hand. Last night we played a show in Dallas, and during the show, I thought to myself how much I love playing in my band and how I was meant to do just that.

I knew when I met Carrie, that we would one day have a family, and this would change my life in a big way. I wanted to be a Dad, and I told her so. I knew that I would be there for my kids like my parents were for me. I knew that my road days would be severely diminished. I was and continue to be okay with that. I will be a guitar player and a performing musician until the day I die. In fact, I want to be buried with a guitar. I'm just going to have to learn to balance this with being a father to three boys.

So, I now have a new set of priorities. I am slightly embarrassed to admit that I have never had a "real" job. I have never been to a job interview. I have never had benefits or a 401K. I did manage to do two smart things. First, I graduated from Kansas State University with a degree in History. Second, I bought a house. Carrie will tell you that I am the world's biggest tight wad. I have never cared about making money, but what I had I never wanted to spend. To get by, I did what I had to do to pay my bills and play the guitar. That's the whole story.

Before this happened to us, I would rather have worn a pair of Crocs into a biker bar than looked for, and actually went to, a full time job. Full time jobs meant no flexibility to hit the open road at a moment's notice. There would be no flying down the highway from one town to the other with your four best friends. I feel sorry for those who have not been able to do that. I am very lucky and very blessed to have done it for a long time.

Now, I have an overwhelming feeling of responsibility. I don't mind it, but it's a little scary. I am officially looking for a full time job with benefits. I have been for a while. I even have a resume. I checked the want ads, and since there was no listing for "best selling author", I started to look around. I asked myself what I would like to do. Sales is the obvious choice. I have been selling things to people for years. I have no problem speaking to large and small crowds. I like being around people, and when I believe in something, I can get behind it and sell it no anyone. So, my search is in full swing. I would like to think that I will prove to be an invaluable asset to some lucky company.

Mainly, I want to be able to afford food for my family. I want them to have a nice place to live. I want them to have clothes. Naked triplets would freak people out.

I got to be the boy who never grew up for a long time. I got to live in Never Never Land. Well, I don't think I will ever completely grown up, and they will always know me in Never Never Land, but I hope to find a new address in the real world.

For a long time, I questioned the existence of God. However, after meeting Carrie and seeing those three boys I am convinced that he not only exists, but he is a funny guy. He's hilarious. I have my views about faith, and I do not wish to start any sort of debate. They are mine and mine alone.

I laugh when I imagine God and how he came to give us three boys.

God's Assistant: Um, Hey God. We need to go over some things.

God: Cant' we wait until the game's over? I need to make sure the Yankees lose.

God's Assistant: Not really. This shouldn't take you long.

God: Okay. Okay. What is it?

God's Assistant: We have one more set of spontaneous triplets to pass out this year, and you really need to make a final decision.

God: Didn't we narrow it down to like three choices?

God's Assistant: Yes, the Robinsons in Rhode Island. Nice couple. They would be good. Then there was the Davis Family in Nevada. When you were drinking wine the other day, you mentioned those two in Austin.

God: Oh yes, Mike and Carrie Krug.

God's Assistant: I don't need to remind you that Mike has never had a job. He is sort of a drinker, and he has very little patience. Carrie is no Jobe herself, and I think we should look at other candidates.

God: They feel right to me. It will be good for him to finally get his act together.

God's Assistant: Yes, but what about Carrie?

God: What about her? She married him. Let her suffer the consequences. Besides, I never give people any more than they can handle.

God's Assistant: There are many who would debate that.

God: Just give the triplets to them. By the way, make it three boys.

God's Assistant: Really? That seems like a bit much.

God: Just do it. I have spoken and whatnot. By the way, after you are done with that, bring the Ford around. I feel like going for a drive.

God's Assistant: Oh no. The Pink and Yellow one?

God: Yep.

In my mind, that's how the whole thing went down. I told Carrie the other day, "We were given the biggest blessing we could have been given. However, it's going to cost us."

She agreed.

I'm ready to pay....just as soon as I find a job.