Rings, Phones, and Stores

Carrie had a toe ring when I met her. It was just a silver ring on her toe that I always found very attractive. Apparently, you don't take these things off. However, when you are pregnant with triplets, and your body starts to swell you HAVE to take them off. The other morning, I was getting breakfast together and Carrie came in and sat down in the living room.

Carrie: We need to take my toe ring off.

Me: Ten-Four.

I go and get a bit of Carrie's body lotion and put it on her toe. I start to pull the ring off.

Carrie: OHHH!!! OOOWWWW!!!!!!!!!! THAT REALLY HURTS!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE %$#@ ARE YOU DOING? STOP!!!

In my mind the toe ring was like a band aid. You rip it off as fast as you can, and it will be over quick.

It didn't work out this way.

I got it part way off and she still is screaming pretty loud. That thing was really on there tight. I grabbed a hold of her leg for leverage and really started to tug at it. I had to stop when it was like half-way off.

Carrie: HOLD ON!! OH THAT HURTS!!!

I figured we were past the hard part, so I gave it one more yank and off it came.

That thing WAS on there.

Her wedding ring had to come off a few weeks ago. She was upset by this, or she was just trying to make me feel good.

Carrie: I need something to wear. Can I get like a fake one to wear around?

Me: Of course.

She orders a ring off of the internet that shows up a few days later.

The "diamond" on this sucker is like 8 times as large as the one on the actual ring I gave her.

Me: What are we trying to say here with this ring Queen Latifah?

Carrie: It didn't look that big in the picture.

Me: It's like 8 times as big as the real one.

Carrie: I want people to know I'm married.

Me: Oh, I think they know. I think they know. Or at least they hope you're married.

Carrie: Shut Up!

Me: Okay.

Then I shut up. It's always best to shut up. Oftentimes I am not very good at shutting up. That never goes well for me.

In other news.........

There was almost an incident at Babies R Us the other day.

I am starting to think that employees at Babies R Us are people that couldn't hack it over at Toys R Us, so they got kicked down to the baby store.

Carrie wanted to order the bedding for the cribs. Now, the bedding that she picked out is only available online. However, we were told that you can't get a triplet discount online. Also, for security reasons, you can only use a certain number of gift cards for online purchases.

What?

These are Babies R Us Gift Cards. They were purchased by our friends and family. Babies R Us already HAS the money. We just have the little plastic cards.

My head hurts.

We go into the store and talk to the person on the Registry counter.

Carrie: Hi, I would like to order crib bedding that is only available online. I wanted to do it in the store so that we could get a multiples discount and I could use my gift cards.

Clerk: What? Online? What's a gift card?

Carrie: The bedding I want is only available online. I thought I could order it through you, pay for it, and get the triplet discount.

Clerk: Bedding. What's bedding? What is a discount? If it isn't in the store, I can't sell it to you.

At this point I have to walk off. I will totally go off on this woman and Carrie will be upset.

Carrie wades back in.

Carrie: You can do special orders? Including stuff online?

Clerk: Yes.

Carrie: Good, then I want to order three sets of bedding.

Clerk: I can't discount anything that isn't in the store. You have to place that order online.

Carrie's head is about to explode. I can see her blood pressure going up and up.

Carrie collects herself.

Carrie: I'm sorry. We will do just that.

We leave.

We go home.

Carrie calls Baby's R Us Online and tries to order the bedding again.

Operator: You can't use that many gift cards online. You have to go to a store to place this order.

Carrie: I was just at a store. You know what. Forget the whole thing.

Me: (in the background) Ask for a supervisor.

Carrie: May I speak to a supervisor?

We are put on hold.

Carrie is getting even more worked up. The Doctor just told us that she has to watch her blood pressure.

Me: Let me talk to them.

Carrie is tired and gives up the phone.

Supervisor: Mrs. Krug

Me: No, you got Mr. Krug now.

Supervisor: I'm sorry I thought we had a Mrs. Krug on the line.

Me: No, and I think it's better for you that you don't.

Supervisor: What exactly is the problem here? My operator tells me you are upset about the discount we are offering.

Me: No, we are upset that we can't use our gift cards to purchase this bedding.

Supervisor: Oh that's simple. Just go to a store and place the order.

I have no idea why we wonder why the United States of America is having rough economic times.

Me: Just got back from one of your stores. We tried this same thing, and the clerk acted like we were speaking Swahili.

Supervisor: Oh. I'm very sorry. You can only use five gift cards for online orders. You will have to pay the rest.

Me: Why on earth would I do that? You HAVE the money. These are gift cards. From your store. Bought and paid for.

Supervisor: I know it's confusing Sir, but Babies R Us Online and Babies R Us are two different companies.

Me: With the same Gift Card for both places. The way your blood sucking corporation is set up is not my problem. We want this bedding. You HAVE the money. We've been to the store and they aren't interested in helping us spend the money that you already have. This has led us to you.

Supervisor: I understand your frustration. How about this? I will give you a 30% discount across the board and free shipping to make up for this. How about that?

Me: Awesome.

I hand the phone back to Carrie who completes the transaction.

We save almost $200 on the deal.

The boys will have bedding.

Peace is restored.

I would like to take a moment and thank everyone for their comments. I know that I have said it before, but we really enjoy reading them. We really like the comments from other parents with multiples. All of you have been so supportive and it is so good to hear that people had triplets and actually lived.

One more thing, Carrie and I, along with all of Back Porch Mary went and saw Ricky Skaggs and Kentucky Thunder last night. Carrie made it through the whole show. She would go sit down for a bit, and then come stand right in the middle of the crowd with me for a while and then do it all over. She never complained. I knew she was uncomfortable, but she knew how much that show meant to me, so she hung in. That's how much she loves me.

I'm a lucky guy.

If you get a chance, check out Ricky and his band. It's Bluegrass, and they are the best at it. Shows like that restore my faith in the world. Music like that is a testament to all the things that are good, right, and pure in this world.